>Bullying Can Be Stopped

>Fellow Romance Lover, Katibabs over at Babbling About Books, and More has shared her story about being bullied in middle school. She’s donating a $1 for every comment up to $500 for charity. Like Kati points out, you don’t have to be gay to be bullied. My Baby is an excellent case in point. Baby has always been picked on in school, but it came to a head last year in middle school. The child would come home every day with one horror story after another.

Shower curtains in the locker room being ripped open while she was changing. Pushing and shoving her into lockers in the hall. Stealing her bag. Tormenting her with name calling. You name it, these sorry little *$#&%& put my child through hell. We started communicating the situation to the schools at the beginning of the school year (first week in September). It took them seven months to finally wake up when they got a child on video hitting Baby on the back of the head with a note binder.


I can’t tell you how livid that still makes me. Do you want to know WHY they said they put it down to nothing? Because Baby was on the honor roll. WTF. Because a kid is making good grades you ASSUME there’s not a problem? What kind of logic is that when the kid AND the parents are complaining about the situation.

But our vigilance paid off. We stopped Baby from being bullied, and we made damn sure she wasn’t doing the same to others as there were some signs. We made the school sit up and take notice by demanding they to do something. The Squeaky Wheel does get serviced. Baby still gets picked on, but she says it’s not bad, and she knows that we’re going to back her up if that changes in the future. I ask her about it regularly and I monitor her moods to see how things are going. I know what to look for because I pay attention to what she’s saying and doing.

She’s a smart kid, my Baby, but if this bullying had persisted, God know what might have happened down the road. Perhaps she could have become another Tyler Clementi ending her own life. Or maybe bullying might have eventually turned her into a killer such as Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold when they massacred 12 students and one teacher at Columbine High School on April 20, 1999 or Seung-Hui Cho at the Virginia Tech massacre on April 16, 2007. While bullying isn’t cited as the main causes of these two incidents, there were reports that these three had been bullied. Bullying teaches violence, and violence solves NOTHING.

So click on the link and go comment on Katibabs blog. Help raise awareness about bullying by posting your own stories on your blogs and Facebook profiles. Let people know that we can stop this. Let’s not stand by idly and do nothing about this. Bullying can be stopped. We just have to strengthen our resolve to do so. Education and vigilance. They’re key to breaking the cycle.

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About Monica Burns

A bestselling author of erotic romance, Monica Burns penned her first short romance story at the age of nine when she selected the pseudonym she uses today. From the days when she hid her stories from her sisters to her first completed full-length manuscript, she always believed in her dream despite rejections and setbacks. A workaholic wife and mother, Monica believes it’s possible for the good guy to win if they work hard enough.

2 thoughts on “>Bullying Can Be Stopped

  1. >Hmmm, I'd like to think we're a little more advanced than a pack of wolves. *smile* I also think it's a cop out to blame it on our mammalian brains when we are intelligent creatures.

    After all the therapy I've gone through in the last 30 yrs, there's one thing I'm certain of. All social behavior is learned behavior. The roots IMHO are nothing more than learned behaviors from an individual's environment.

    Example is racism. It's taught, not inherent in man. Hatred is taught it's not inherent.

    While pack animal behavior may still have a role in our behaviors today, I think we've evolved a lot since Neanderthal times and I suggest that we are more than capable of rising above pack animal behavior if we so choose. And choose is the operative word. *smile*

  2. >I hate to say it, but I think the behavior is ingrained in our genetics. It's about pack order, and in the very deepest part of our mammalian selves, we are a pack creature like wolves. We HAVE to know our place in the social structure, and one of the ways we do this is by expressing our dominance and superiority to those we see–for whatever reason–as inferior. Bullying is an expression of a lack of personal esteem, conducted by those who need a means of elevating themselves not only in the eyes of their peers, but in their own eyes. We are better than our mammalian brains, sure, but we are also generally unaware of the fact that it's influencing us… we have conscious, unconscious, and hereditary reasons for doing these things… focusing on one without acknowledging the others is a process doomed to failure. We can say to bullies "bad!" and smack them with a rolled up newspaper, but this doesn't address any of the roots of the problem. It doesn't help them find their place in the social structure of their peer group, it doesn't offer them a way to improve their own self image without tearing down someone else, and it does nothing to prevent a repeat of the behavior.