>Interesting term isn’t it? Got any idea what it means? According to my attitude-ridden, high-school daughter it means you can be just friends with someone and yet it’s ok to have anything from kissing to sex without going steady (or dating as they call it now) with that person. Plus it leaves you free to go and carry on with the same behavior with anyone else at the same time.
Basically it means – NO COMMITMENT.
WTF? My natural instinct is to think that some high-school guy came up with this concept to make it to third base with every girl he can possibly convince to buy into this whole stupid idea. But there’s a part of me that knows this entire thing could just as easily been dreamed up by a girl, just so she could sleep with any guy she wanted.
So what does this have to do with writing? Well, I’m an erotic romance writer. I have explicit, graphic sex in my books, and this is MY daughter coming home and telling me all this crap. So did I do the smart thing and talk to her with all the wisdom and thoughtfulness I’m known for? Yeah RIGHT! No, I threatened and listed ultimatums. Then she turns the tables on me and says, “Well, you have lots of s** in your books.” All this did was add oil to the fire. *sigh*
Later on I was reviewing the whole incident and wondering if I’d over-reacted considering that I believe I’m teaching both of my girls the right things when it comes to sex and their behavior. I mean Oldest and I have had the big “TALK,” and she’s clear on what her parents will and won’t accept as responsible behavior.
But this whole thing has me feeling conflicted. Here I am writing erotic romance which I would never sell to anyone under 18, but in truth, there isn’t anything to keep kids from buying my book online (well they do need a credit card, but lots of kids have those). But there’s no rating system in the bookstores either. Let’s face it, sex is a HUGE responsibility, and there aren’t many kids under 18 who’re ready for that kind of responsibility.
Now, I’m a BIG advocate for people taking responsibility for themselves and their offspring. The DH and I take our responsibility for our kids seriously. They’re well-mannered, polite and well-behaved kids for the most part. Nothing irks me more than seeing kids acting rude while their parents just stand by and do nothing. So am I responsible for kids whose parents don’t take the necessary steps to oversee their actions, monitor their behavior, etc.
So as a writer, how much responsibility do we take on for kids who aren’t really ready for our explicit sex, love and happy ever afters? Although I am conflicted about the question, I have to fall back on the notion that I can’t parent the entire world population. I can’t accept responsibility for others. What do you think?