>Have you ever wished you could be someone or something you’re not? I don’t know about you, but I wish that sort of thing ALL the time. Right now, I’m wishing I could be the world’s biggest, nastiest bitch there is and just rip into some people I know. Why? Because I think they’re obnoxious twits without a spine to hold their heads up. They toe the party line, and never feel comfortable really thinking for themselves. Ohhh, you know someone like that? *grin*
Of course you do! LOL Everyone know someone like that. Hell have the U.S. knows that the other half is like that in terms of politics. *grin* So what do you do to deal with it? To deal with the irritation you feel, the frustration at not getting your voice heard, the frustration at not really being able to reach out to people so that they can know you, understand you?
Me? I just wind up wishing I could be that bitch I mentioned, but deep inside I know I can’t. It’s not who I am. Not matter how snarky someone else gets, no matter how much I want to defend myself, no matter how hard it is, I just let it go. Or rather I try letting it go. Letting go is easy, getting the ego to let go is a different matter altogether Oy! It’s like trying to part the Red Sea! Where the hell is Moses when ya need him! LOL
I watched an interesting Without A Trace episode a little while ago. It was entitled Revelations. It was about a missing priest who was really on a search for redemption. What I found so interesting about the show is that the message in the episode was similar to what I’m writing about here. The message was about letting go of self and launching oneself out into the biosphere with that leap of faith. It was about making amends.
So who do I need to make amends too? I need to make amends to myself. I’ve been neglecting me for a long time I think. So I’m gonna pamper myself, work on being nicer to me, and while I might not say it, I can at least think, F’em, I like who I am and they’re missing out on a good thing not taking the time to look deeper into who I am. Of course, not everyone is going to like. *shrug* That’s okay, as hard as I try there are people I don’t care for. It’s human nature. But then who needs shallow people anyway. *grin* There, I feel lots better now! LOL
Now, lets get back to releasing that ego and moving on!